Image Description: A black note book is open on a table with a white sheet of paper and a “To do” list written out: wake up (checked off), make coffee (checked off), drink coffee (checked off), and make more coffee remains unchecked. A black pen lays on top of the notebook to the side.
It’s a hard thing to do, putting aside cultural standards and redefining for ourselves what we wish to be. I’ve always prized myself on being super busy, accomplished, competing in the rat race with my fellow humans.
It’s everywhere we go. How many meetings or calls did you have? How many items did you check off the list? How much did you do in a day?
Some of these activities may actually be productive and useful, some likely not. For example, I need to call and wrangle with my health insurer over coverage for my wheelchair repairs. But it doesn’t feel productive. It’s a waste of my time, but must be done if I am to have a working wheelchair and be able to move my body where I need to go.
In any case, things I need to do may not be productive, yet they are necessary. What I really strive for are moments when I can accomplish something in my own time without feeling stressed, pushed, or exhausted. Where I feel achievement without sacrificing some part of myself. Where it is effort that is worthwhile, yet doesn’t cost me too much of my well-being.
Reframing Productivity
Srinidhi Raghavan wrote a great piece about listening to our bodies and letting go of typical productivity judgments. Her learning about crip time encouraged her to focus on maintaining her health and mind, and embracing that she needed time without overt action and activity to do so. As she writes and quotes:
“Professor and author Alison Kafer says in her book, Feminist, Queer, Crip: “Crip time is flex time not just expanded but exploded; it requires re-imagining our notions of what can and should happen in time, or recognizing how expectations of ‘how long things take’ are based on very particular minds and bodies. Rather than bend disabled bodies and minds to meet the clock, crip time bends the clock to meet disabled bodies and minds."”
Sometimes the best use of time is actually doing nothing at all! As the Zen master Winnie the Pooh said: “Doing nothing often leads to the very best of something.”
Slowing Down Can Be Productive
I find that I physically cannot move very fast on my feet and so I have to be careful about each step to avoid tripping, losing my balance, and falling. This is a good reminder about how going at our own pace is the best course of action. When I try to move too fast to please others, I am liable to get hurt.
So, slowing down can be better because I’m less likely to make mistakes and create more problems that wouldn’t have existed by going too fast. I think this works in other aspects of my life and am constantly telling myself to slow down and go at my pace.
I really like how in Srinidhi Raghavan’s article she describes a meeting where the participants were disabled and communicating through typing text. She describes how it slowed things down, but also gave the participants space to be more reflective and thoughtful. The end product was of a better quality, because they gave it the time and attention that it deserved.
Tips on Moving Away from Productivity Judgments
I know people (and have experienced this myself) who feel guilt or negatively about themselves because of their variation from the cultural expectations of productivity. I say: don’t embrace those negative feelings and judgments. They are false and misleading. They are a guilt trip for conformity that provides no value.
Instead, reflect on what being productive means to you. What do you need to accomplish for both yourself and others? What is truly important for spending your time (crip time or otherwise)? What is the best use of limited energy and hours? What is the priority for this moment and the day moving forward?
It’s a balance of the time we must spend and the time that we choose to spend. If it is my time, then I cannot worry about the ill-conceived judgments of others. I have to use my time as best as I can, and do the things that matter to me most.
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As you may have heard before, Kelly, we are human beings and not human doings. I remind myself of that often - especially now, as a retired person with, right now, three compression fractures to my spine.